We cannot wait until it is too late for us, or for someone we know, to become an ally and an advocate.

BY MELIKE HILAL GUMUS

IMAGE BY PATSY WISNIEWSKI

Our world has countless issues going around.

Some people care about them, some don’t, and some act like they care but they don’t.

Caring doesn’t only mean recognizing these issues and hoping for a change, it is much more than that. It requires people to use their voice to inform others and contribute to a change. 

Caring means becoming a real ally.

Someone needs to talk about how people are hesitant to talk about the issues around the world. In this case, that someone is me, and unfortunately, a couple of years ago, I was also the person who needed that talk.

You were living in a timeline where you had countless platforms that you could voice your opinions and beliefs, like Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and many more social media platforms, and even face-to-face conversations before the pandemic started. 

However, you didn’t speak up for important things or about anything! Why was that?

I asked myself that question a couple of years ago, and figuring out the answer changed my entire perspective of life and made me the person I am today.

Today, I am thankful that I called myself out and educated myself into changing.

Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t in the dark, ignoring or denying these problems. I was just staying in the shadows, agreeing with other people that were speaking up, but I wasn’t doing anything myself to raise awareness.

And if you ask me now, that was almost as bad as not doing anything about them.

You thought liking a video and a comment, or simply commenting on a post, was enough. You thought just nodding your head when your friend was educating others was enough. You thought knowing what’s right and what’s wrong was enough, even if the ones closest to you didn’t agree and needed education.

It was never enough, and it will never be enough.

I learned that the only way we can make any change in this world is by speaking up and speaking out.

You not speaking up was one less voice, one less fist in these fights, and maybe your silence silenced someone else.

You stayed quiet when a guy made a misogynist joke that made all the girls uncomfortable at a party. How do you know that guy didn’t continue doing these—or escalate and end up hurting a girl—because no one ever said anything to him?

I thought I could never raise awareness and educate other people with my voice, but now I know that I need to try. We never know who needs a little push to change their perspective on things, I needed that, and I am glad that I changed.

Your voice is much more powerful than you think, so you have to learn how to use it for the good of people, especially for the ones who need it the most.

When you double-click on a post about a social issue online, what makes you different from the other thousands of people who also liked the post? How are you informing any other people and showing them that you support that cause, that you are with them?

I really thought I was supporting these groups, that I was on their side being a good ally, but in reality, I was nothing more than a clicktivist who didn’t have her own voice.

Now I am an activist for anything and everything that I think is important—in person and online. More importantly, I found my voice, and now I am never quiet. I constantly try to inform and educate the people around me on important issues.

You used to be ashamed to call yourself a feminist because modern-day feminists had a bad reputation between people, internalized misogyny…nothing more. What people thought about you was more important to you than fighting for what you believed for.

I was part of the problem! 

I didn’t realize it then, but yes, I really was. I believed in the equality of women and men in every way, but I was still letting myself be controlled by male figures and didn’t have the courage to fight for what I believed in.

Even you were barely hearing your own voice, let alone others. How can you help other people when you don’t have the confidence to stand by your beliefs?

Now I consider myself a raging feminist, and I am proud to be an educated woman in a man’s world. Instead of feeling judged, I feel powerful now when someone calls me opinionated when I talk about important issues that need to be talked about.

It is never too late to speak up about something until it is too late. 

You have to think about the consequences of your actions; if you think someone is in the wrong or saying something that can be hurtful or offensive to someone and you don’t do anything about it, they will think it’s okay.

Using racial slurs or other derogatory terms, for example, which is never okay in any situation.

You have been in places that you heard people using them, why didn’t you warn them and explain to them that those are not okay?

I didn’t want to be a buzzkill at a party when those people were singing those things in a song, so I was being stupid, insensitive, and inconsiderate. 

It’s always more important to be a decent and aware human being, so please, let’s all be buzzkills in situations like these.

You could have done better.

We cannot bring someone back to life or erase their trauma after their awful and scary experiences. We all know that these problems exist, so we have to start talking and posting about them.

We cannot wait until it is too late for us, or for someone we know, to become an ally and an advocate.

If we have an opinion on an important issue that can educate and benefit people, we have to find our voice and never let go.

We always have to speak up and speak out. We always have to be better.

Melike Hilal Gumus is an international student from Turkey, studying journalism at Humber College. She has a passion for storytelling, travelling, and self-improvement. When she is not working, you will find her reading a book, or binging old TV shows with a coffee in her hand.

Image: Patsy Wisniewski, Sketchbook collage 5, coloured pencils on sketching paper, 2021.

Edited for publication by Emily Sarah Hean, as part of the Creative Book Publishing Program.

HLR Spotlight is a collaboration between the Faculty of Media & Creative Arts and the Faculty of Liberal Arts & Sciences and Innovative Learning at Humber College in Toronto, Ontario. This project is funded by Humber’s Office of Research & Innovation.