Unbecoming Prophecy: an exercise in psychosis, after Roxanna Bennett

by Khashayar Mohammadi

community feature // online exclusive (Vol 2, Issue 9)

consider yourself pre-cosmic

pre IS and -ism

pre Cause and -cosm

/the heat map of an eyelid

that lightsource

think of this as your birth

think of this as your death

think of an animal

and the alchemy gazing through their eyes

don’t move

consider that there is nothing outside vision  

think about it not as light and shadow

but as three dimensional color

that inflates to hug the shape it bleeds away from

see it for the first time

is this language?

consider your constructs

consider your reason

consider a poem as a voice that vibrates

consider the vibration as an excitation of air

hear the oscillations of air that precede words

the mechanics of a sound

hear the friction: X X

hear the plosion: B B

move your body

locate the process

locate where in the body you move

locate where in the body moves you

locate where in your body is your body

where in your body do you feel your self

where weighs heavier against your life

Is it your head? your heart? your throat

or perhaps your spine? a fingertip

move without knowing

move without knowing

the discomfort of doubt

cosmic dejection: meet objects for the first time

are you sure they feel how you think they feel?

reach out and touch them for the first time

try to push through

move your body into an uncomfortable position

feel your body in tension with the world                resist

float in this tension

interpret the tension as an endless cosmic fall in the universe

where do you situate yourself

within your body

within your mind

how big are you in the abyss of an eyelid?

a galaxy or a particle

are you solid or nebulous?

open your eyes and consider the spectra of (UN)consciousness you’ve inhabited

and consider reality as product of dualism

consider body as a rejection of dualism

consider mind as a product of body

consider the mind not continuous in a line, but on a sphere

x.through body, y.through mind, z.through time

resist the music

resist the tempo

resist harmony

Leibniz forgot to consider

truths of delirium

truths of unreason

truths of absurdity

open your eyes

for the very first time

this is your unbecoming

Khashayar “Kess” Mohammadi (He/They) is a queer, Iranian born, Toronto-based Poet, Writer and Translator. They were shortlisted for the 2021 Austin Clarke poetry prize, they are the winner of the 2021 Vallum Poetry Prize and the author of three poetry chapbooks and two translated poetry chapbooks. Their debut poetry collection Me, You, Then Snow is out with Gordon Hill Press. Their second book WJD is forthcoming in a double volume with the translation of Saeed Tavanaee’s The Ocean Dweller from Gordon Hill Press fall 2022. Their collaborative poetry manuscript with poet Klara Du Plessis is forthcoming with Palimpsest Press Fall 2023.

Formerly the AbleHamilton Poetry Collective, the Ontario D/deaf/HoH, Disabled, Sick, Mad and Neuroatypical Poetics Collective comprises a group of poets from those identities who work to host events for members of their communities and promote their writing. Founded in 2018 as a literary festival dedicated to the work of Deaf and disabled artists in Ontario, the collective has had ties to the cities of Toronto, Hamilton, Guelph, and Ottawa but is now able to feature poets from across the province thanks to a shift to an online festival. As an organization, the collective works to overcome systemic barriers, conduct accessible events, and feature all Deaf and disabled performers.